2009 New Year's Resolutions

I always seem to struggle with the point of this Blog. I seem to be driven to have one, but I don't know what to put here. I always feel it has to be something grandiose. OK, maybe I'll do something here more often now, I'm sort of waking up from the last two years.

Let's start with my New Year's Resolutions:

1 - Exercise, Eat Right, Lose Weight. Not original, but necessary. I sit down, mostly at a microscope, at my job. My main hobby at home is playing guitar/recording music. So yeah, even with the best of intentions, I need to kick myself in the rear a bit to get started with this one. So, I've joined a health club. Now I need to go on a regular basis. The guilt over paying for nothing should motivate me at the beginning!

2 - Continue to "wake up". Related to NYR #3...everything about life just hit me around November 2008. All of the loses my family sustained, the weight of the world issues of worrying way too much about things I can't control (misuse of global resources, greed, humanity's inability to learn from historical mistakes). In other words, start embracing the Serenity Prayer. You know it, "God grant me the wisdom...." So, I spent most of November just locked away in my basement, ignoring the world, staring at the walls, thinking everything was way too much to deal with. Around December, I started forcing myself to do things, musical things, stuff that made me happy and involved. It was an effort at first, but then I started to really get into it and I felt a lot better. I decided how I want approach things here in 2009, and it really lifted a burden off of my shoulders.

3 - Try not to remind or tell everyone I meet how tragic my life has been the last two years. Most of you know that I lost my father, a daughter and my sister in the last two years. It has taken me a long time to get my head screwed on somewhat straight because of that. It has totally defined who I am and what I believe now vs. who I was a few years ago. But it's time to move forward. Wisdom comes at a high price, but I don't need to wear that high price on my sleeve (although I have a great hummingbird tattoo on my right forearm in honor of Jenny). You know what I'm saying. It's time to let my lessons inform me internally. I don't need to set up all I say with a reference to losing loved ones. I am not looking for the pity anymore. I feel stronger now about my beliefs, and that's all I need to make public, is just a sense of strength about myself.

4- MUSIC. I have many projects I want to create. Some are years old and need to be finished. Because of the personal issues above, I have not been too inspired the past two years. I won't make any cute comments about being prolific. Being prolific is in my nature, because music is my diary. Not every CD or song I do is great, but they are all honest. There is much I've left unsaid, and much I want to say. It's time to exercise my voice again.

5 - Get Crome Yellow back together again. My old band was really freekin' cool. And jammin' with your buddies is damn good for the soul.